The One with Elf Quotes


Friday, December 12, 2008

I LOVE the movie Elf. I love the music, the humor, the storyline, the everything. So when I couldn't remember the line about "swirly twirly gum drops" I googled "Elf quotes" and had a good laugh with Alisha reading these out loud:

[Buddy sees the mail room for the first time]
Buddy: It's just like Santa's workshop! Except it smells like mushrooms... and everyone looks like they wanna hurt me...

[answering the phone]
Buddy: Buddy the Elf! What's your favorite color?

Buddy: Sounds like somebody needs to sing a Christmas Carol.
Jovie: No way.
Buddy: The best way to spread Christmas Cheer, is singing loud for all to hear.
Jovie: Thanks, but I don't sing.
Buddy: Oh, well, it's just like talking, except longer and louder, and you move your voice up and down.
Jovie: I can sing, I just choose not to sing. Especially in front of other people.
Buddy: If you can sing alone, you sing in front of other people. There's no difference.
Jovie: Actually, there's a BIG difference.
Buddy: No there's not. Wait...
[Starts singing loud and off-key]
Buddy: I'm singing/I'm in a store/and I'm siiiiiingiiiiing!/I'm in a store/and I'm siiiiiingiiiiing!
Gimbel's Manager: HEY! There's no singin' in the North Pole!
Buddy: Yes there is!
Gimbel's Manager: No there's not!
Buddy: We sing all the time!
Gimbel's Manager: No you don't!
Buddy: Especially when we build toys!
[Back to Jovie]
Buddy: See?

Buddy: We elves try to stick to the four main food groups: candy, candy canes, candy corn and syrup.

Buddy: What about santa's cookies? I suppose parents eat those too?

Santa: That's another thing... Buddy you should know that your father... he's on the naughty list.
Buddy: Nooooo!

Puffin: Hey Buddy wanna pick some snowberries?
Buddy: Not now Arctic Puffin!

Buddy: [out of breath from chasing Michael] Wow, you're fast. I'm glad I caught up to you. I waited 5 hours for you. Why is your coat so big? So, good news - I saw a dog today. Have you seen a dog? You probably have. How was school? Was it fun? Did you get a lot of homework? Huh? Do you have any friends? Do you have a best friend? Does he have a big coat, too?...
Michael: - Go away !

Gimbel's Manager: This, is the North Pole.
Buddy: No it isn't.
Gimbel's Manager: Yes it is.
Buddy: No it isn't.
Gimbel's Manager: Yes it is!
Buddy: No it isn't! Where's the snow?

Gimbel's Manager: Why are you smiling like that?
Buddy: I just like to smile, smiling's my favorite.

Walter: Who sent this Christmas Gram?
Buddy: What's a Christmas Gram? I want one!

Buddy: Who the heck are you?
Gimbel's Santa: What are you talkin' about? I'm Santa Claus.
Buddy: No, you're not.
Gimbel's Santa: Uh, why of course I am! Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho.
Buddy: Well, if you're Santa, what song did I sing for you on your birthday this year?
Gimbel's Santa: Um, "Happy Birthday" of course. Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho. How old are you son?
Kid with Santa: Four.
Gimbel's Santa: You're a big boy. What's your name?
Kid with Santa: Paul.
Gimbel's Santa: Now what can I get you for Christmas?
Buddy: Don't tell him what you want, he's a liar.
Gimbel's Santa: Let the kid talk.
Buddy: You disgust me! How can you live with yourself?
Gimbel's Santa: Just cool it, Zippy.
Buddy: You sit on a throne of lies.
Gimbel's Santa: Look, I'm not kiddin'.
Buddy: You're a fake.
Gimbel's Santa: I'm a fake?
Buddy: Yes!
Gimbel's Santa: How'd you like to be dead, huh? Ho, ho, just kidding.
Buddy: You stink.
Gimbel's Santa: I think you're gonna have a good Christmas, all right.
Buddy: You smell like beef and cheese, you don't smell like Santa.

Buddy: Francisco! That's fun to say! Francisco... Frannncisco... Franciscooo...

Buddy: [thinking Miles is an elf] Did you have to borrow a reindeer to get down here?
Miles Finch: Hey, jackweed, I get more action in a week than you've had in your entire life. I've got houses in L.A., Paris and Vail. In each one, a 70 inch plasma screen. So I suggest you wipe that stupid smile off your face before I come over there and SMACK it off! You feeling strong, my friend? Call me elf one more time.
Buddy: [after a pause] He's an angry elf.

Buddy: [burps loud and long] Did you hear that?

Buddy: Hi!
Deb: Hi!
Buddy: Do you remember me?
Deb: I do! I didn't recognize you!
Buddy: I know I'm in work clothes!

Nun: But the children love the books!

Santa: I've been to New York thousands of times.
Buddy: Really?
Santa: Mm-hmm.
Buddy: What's it like?
Santa: Well, there are some things you should know. First off, you see gum on the street, leave it there. It isn't free candy.
Buddy: Oh.
Santa: Second, there are, like, thirty Ray's Pizzas. They all claim to be the original. But the real one's on 11th. And if you see a sign that says "Peep Show", that doesn't mean that they're letting you look at the new toys before Christmas.

Buddy: Actually, I'm a human, but I was raised by elves.
Carolyn: I'm a human... raised by humans.
Buddy: Cool.

Emily: You like sugar, huh?
Buddy: Is there sugar in syrup?
Emily: Yes.
Buddy: Then YES!

Buddy: Have you seen these toilets? They're GINORMOUS!

Buddy: Watch out, the yellow ones don't stop!

Elf Teacher: Now, before we learn how to build the latest in extreme graphic chipset processors, let's recite the code of the elves, shall we?

[Buddy is pressing the elevator buttons at the same time]
Buddy: It looks like a Christmas tree.

Buddy: SANTA! OH MY GOD! SANTA'S COMING! I KNOW HIM! I KNOW HIM!

Buddy: It's just nice to meet another human that shares my affinity for elf culture.

Buddy: I thought maybe we could make ginger bread houses, and eat cookie dough, and go ice skating, and maybe even hold hands.

Buddy: I passed through the seven levels of the Candy Cane forest, through the sea of swirly twirly gum drops, and then I walked through the Lincoln Tunnel.

Buddy: First we'll make snow angels for a two hours, then we'll go ice skating, then we'll eat a whole roll of Tollhouse Cookiedough as fast as we can, and then we'll snuggle.

Buddy: [to the doctor] Can I listen to your necklace?

[reacting to sign saying "World's Best Cup of Coffee"]
Buddy: You did it! Congratulations! World's best cup of coffee! Great job, everybody! It's great to be here.

Buddy: The best way to spread Christmas cheer is singing loud for all to hear.

Buddy: I'm a cotton-headed ninny-muggins.

Buddy: [reading the note he left on the etch-a-sketch] "I'm sorry I ruined your lives, and crammed eleven cookies into the VCR."

Walter: What do you want? Some money?
Buddy: No! I just wanted to meet you and thought maybe you might want to meet me.
Walter: Who wouldn't wanna meet you?

Buddy: [as he is hit by a snowball] SON of a NUTcracker!

Buddy: [quickly, and high pitched] I love you. I love you! I LOVE YOU!

Buddy: [to Jovi] I think you're really beautiful and I feel really warm when I'm around you and my tongue swells up.
[pause]
Buddy: So... do you wanna eat food?

Gimbel's Manager: [after Buddy has decorated the entire toy department] Hey guys, you seen the place? Pretty good, they must have brought in a professional. I dunno why, but someone's gunning for my job. But look, let's stick together on this. If you get wind of anything, call me on my radio. Channel three, code word is "Santa's got a brand new bag".

Buddy: That's shocking!

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